My body is shutting down.....its weird to even say those words...I feel like a NASA pilot..."ready for lift off.... Houston we have a problem...All systems are to be shut down".
It is hard to describe where I am...but I will try...For the last 24-36 hours things have been BAD. I have been choking and gagging and puking pretty much non stop and then I started crying (which I have not done in months). Mommy could tell I was pretty miserable. This awesome nurse Amy came over and we increased the pain meds by a ton....Whew! I am resting much, much better. The doctor decided that the feedings are hurting me more than helping me........ and my body is in the process of shutting down.
This is a weird place to be in and it is so difficult to put to words but....Mommy, she is the bomb, the best and my ALL.... I love you so much mommy. It pains me to leave HER. But I also have this quiet inner peace that says this will be OK....this is part of life and because it could not be fair, Heavenly Father sent His Son, Jesus Christ. Oh how I love them too! My family is around and I am truly, completely loved. And then there is the angels that are with me...its incredible, indescribable and amazing. I feel so full of love....like in the movie "Ghost" when Patrick Swazye says "its incredible...you take all the love with you"...I feel that right now...its soo true.
Its incredible, amazing and indescribable....but listen to your heart...you can feel it (well, most of it) .....it is overwhelming and breathtaking!
I love you mommy.......forever, its a promise! Thanks for being my superhero and for being there for EVERY moment.
Just love...purest love....forever love,
Yours ALWAYS,
Bosty
1 comment:
I love that movie "ghost" as well. What a cute quote, its so true!! I'm glad boston is feeling better with medicine. You're amazing katie, way to stay strong, and you have such an amazing family to support you! You guys are still in our prayers! We love you! :)
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